We didn't get a photo because Aaron was all like - whatever and then 4 blocks later he was all about it. yeah. Boys. But anyway - that was awesome. My claim to fame. So far we've just walked around, window shopped and ate dinner - now we're getting ready to swim.

Check out Aaron's blog - www.theparagon.org - I think he has a few links as to what he's doing with the conference and where we're staying. The "W" hotel on Ontario - seriously nice hotel.

I'm not so sure I'm going home tomorrow now - I might stay the whole time with Aaron, but we'll see how it goes with Jessica tomorrow, I might not care about anything but my own bed ... haha.

Jessica: "Schaap."

Me: "Um - ok - can you say 'My name is Jessica Schaap .. ?' "

Jessica: "Ranae."

Me: "Wow, you're right! So, can you say 'My name is Jessica Ranae Schaap .. ?' "

Jessica: "No."

I have 3 tattoo's, although if you look at my flickr account you could find this out easliy.

I had a breast reduction when I was 18 because of massive back problems. And I'll totally do it all over again once I'm done bearing children if I need to.

I was breast-fed until I was almost 3. (hi mom!) But we also lived in Africa.

I was born in Africa. We moved back to the states just before my 3rd birthday. My first memories are of the last 6 months or so that we lived in Africa.

I bought a motorcycle on my 18th birthday and sold it a few months later.

I had a pet monkey in Africa. No, really.

My parents were going to name me Joni Nicole and changed it in the delivery room to Jodi Michelle.

I used to want to be a boy for a day.

I smoked in highschool.

I don't drink milk, never have.

I also wrote a childrens book but doubt I'll ever go through the motions of publishing it either. I also wrote a memoir in highschool - still have the transcript and I know I'll never publish that one.

We don't have cable because I'm a lot bit addicted to reality TV.

I don't read books by non-Christian authors because I don't like the unrealistic love stories or word porn. Although I have ventured out recently to non-sexual love stories and or other types of fiction by referral only.

If I went back to college I would major in Biology.

Anything I don't know about you?

And this is just adorable.

Mitch asked me to a school dance, but would I like to see a movie before hand? After checking with my parents I said yes and then couldn't keep my glittery eyes off of him in art for the entire week prior to the dance.

The wonderful Friday comes and I must have tried on 8 outfits - none of them working. I don't remember what I finally decided on but I was ready by the time he came to pick me up.

This is where the date goes so terribly wrong. The plan was to get some dinner, rent a movie and then go to the dance. His idea of dinner? A trip through the McDonald's drive thru. It gets better.

He orders a 20 piece chicken nugget dinner with 2 super size fries and 2 cokes. Uh. First of all, why did you just order for me and since you did why didn't you ask me first what I wanted and or how hungry I was?

We made it back to his parents house where I met his mom and dad and got red in the face because they could already tell the night was not going well. He then sets up TV dinner trays in front of the big screen tv in the basement and puts in the latest James Bond movie.

For crying out loud here people. I'm a 15 year old school girl. 3 years ago I was still playing with dolls and only one year ago did I finally kiss a boy on the lips. Dating was completely new to me, but if this was dating - count me out.

He counted out the nuggets and drew an invisible line in the carton for clarification. When I had 5 left he reminded me that those were mine and I should eat them. I told him I was full and he could have them if he wanted. The imaginary line quickly disappeared, as did the nuggets - and his breath.

I don't know what part of the movie things went awry in the sending wrong messages department but at one point he leans over and tries to kiss me. A better illustration would be he leaned over but before he got to my face the vacuum started and my he got my hair in his mouth from all the suction instead of my cheek - or whatever he thought he was aiming for.

I went numb - how much worse could this night get? I still had to go to the dance with him!? He unsuccessfully tried to get me to make out with him and in the process of the vacuum mechanism he had he managed to mangle my neck while I was fighting him to stop it already.

He did get the picture and we finished the movie in an awkward silence which was followed by and equally awkward drive to the dance. He ended the night by giving me a birthday card. No I'm not kidding. My birthday was a good week away. And I have no idea how he knew.

But I decided to forgo his offer to bring me home as I arranged, very quickly, to be taken home by some friends. When I got home I told my parents what happened and asked them to give me a reason to tell him to get lost. They did. As did my brothers.

When Mitch called the next day my brother Jamie answered the phone and asked if this was the Hoover that wanted to talk to his little sister. Mitch must have said, uh ... yeah I guess - and then my brother said, well you can't.

Have I mentioned how cool my brothers are?

I did have some pretty wild experiences while pregnant. I took my wedding ring off in my eighth month because of all the water retention - I was the Hoover dam people - and I had women in the grocery store telling me how they were praying for my unborn bastard child.

Uh huh.

I looked them right in the eye and told them, as loudly as possible, how wonderful of them to be praying for a bastard child but to please get their noses out of my 3 foot radius zoned MY BUSINESS and step off. I then continued to, loudly, explain to them how much water retention hurt and holy crap if this child doesn't stop resting on my special place I might just go crazy and rip it out all by myself. Oh and then I told them, politely, that I would let my husband know some stranger was praying for our child. The child we were giving birth to, in wedlock.

Or I could blame some kind of phsycological damage on my brothers ...

When I was about 6 they used to make "crystals" out of super glue in their bedrooms. This was always very top secret. I don't know why - but I totally bought into it. One day they were showing me their awesome! crystals! and oh wow! did you see the cool crystal!?! I was, as always, enamored by my brothers delights and worshiped their every move. But then they told me not to touch it.

Right. So at 6 when my completely god-worthy brothers show me their top secret crystals and tell me NOT to touch them? what am I supposed to do? listen? Nope. I touched them. I have no idea if they were in on this together or if there was merit to the prank they were pulling but they both freaked out accordingly and started telling me all the horrible things that were going to happen to my finger now.

Like, did I know it was going to fall off after the glue sufficiently burned an outrageous hole through my finger exposing the bone and blood and cool ...

To their credit my finger started to turn white and I started to cry and wail and fling about. They captured my little flying body and rushed me to the bathroom to run cold water over the wound. There was no hole and I still have my finger but I've never touched glue drying ever again.

There's been a lot of uncomfortable conversations but I don't know if advice was ever exchanged.

Have you ever had someone direct you to a place in your life whether that's the port a potty down the road or the job you've dream of only to have wished you never asked? Please, please, please do tell!!

Jessica thought this was amazing. She wanted to continue to take a shower on her own - so I shut the door and walked away for a minute. Then I went back to check on her and see if she was done.

I opened the door and there she was standing under the steady stream of steamy water. As soon as she noticed me she was exasperated that I would invade her privacy and told me as much.

"MOM! I'm in the shower! Close door!"

Like a puppy in trouble I stuck my tail between my legs, did as I was told and ran to Aaron to tell him how useless I felt as a mother right then. My little girl doesn't even need me to help her in the shower.

We gave her about 3 more minutes and then both of us went to check on her and try to coax her out of the shower to get ready. We both were totally yelled at for even thinking of peering in on her in the shower. Mom AND Dad. No. No way.

We were forcefully told to mind our own business and let her be in the shower.

We shut the door and looked at each other in silence which Aaron soon broke and said ...

"We both just got yelled at. By our two year old."

I chose this journal entry because as suggested when I was reading it again 8 years later I actually cringed. I don't know if it's funny really, a little more heart breaking that at 15 I had such brave things to say to someone who had hurt me.

This could have been written about a number of people in my life at the time and I honestly don't know who it was about back then. My favorite line? "I'm sorry I realize theres more behind the gate of your backyard." Because at 15 my world was always very small and bubble like. Atleast there was a moment that I got it.

May 17, 99 Wed.
I'm sorry I tried so hard to care. I'm sorry for closing my eyes and being such an easy target for your ego. I'm sorry I was so assinine to you. I'm sorry I was never perfect. I'm sorry you could never look at me and see yourself. I'm sorry I'm my own person. I'm sorry I didn't know how to say no.
I'm sorry I didn't do this earlier. I'm sorry I loved you so blindly. I'm sorry you're the way you are. I'm sorry I don't love you and don't want you. I'm sorry I realize there's more to life. I'm sorry I realize there's more behind the gate of your backyard. I'm sorry I dream. I'm sorry I escape but I am never sorry that dignity, wisdom, trust and loyalty formed within my being because of disaster. I'm not sorry for you.

On Wednesday I started this project. A friend of ours has a leap-year birthday and they happens to be in town over the weekend that his birthday would normally take place. So we're having a surprise party.

They didn't ask me to make this, I decided it sounded like immense fun and set out to dazzle even myself. Then it was Thursday night and I was still layering the paste and newspaper and I was about to throw it away.

I just finished it - we're leaving in T-minus one hour, so it's probably good the glue is drying. If you can't tell what this is you are not allowed to breathe for 2 1/2 days. Seriously.

I'm going to pretend I'm an ultra-celebrity on iTunes and this is my awesome play list. Enjoy.

In The Morning - Junior Boys ... This song is one of my favorites right now. Most songs I love have something to do with the beat and the bass. The bass is the most important part of a song for me. Why? I don't know, I liken it to all those times I danced around a fire to the beat of drums in Africa ... maybe it's just in my blood. This song is also good to reflective moments or an escape from a current reality that a break is needed from.

Scarecrow - Beck ... This is the only song of Beck's that I have right now, but I like it. A lot. It's a good working song for me. Helps me hammer out the photos or posts. Also helps me write for other ventures and personal use.

Change your mind - Bonnie Lee ... The blues. I love the blues. And a good woman singing her troubles away, who doesn't need that every once in a while? Plus, the guitar and piano in this? Makes me wish I lived in Tennessee and sat on the porch with Bonnie while she hammered this one out.

Still Dirrty - Christina Aguilera ... I am a die hard Christina fan, her voice is amazing. She could sing the ABC's and I would buy it. I still got it. And I like that she sings about it. I am a woman and I like to be and feel sexy, this song can accomplish this even if I'm sitting at my computer in my pajama's.

Kissing You - Des'ree ... I was infatuated with the movie Romeo and Juliet, in fact it's one of the first video's I bought with my own money. This song gives me goose bumps, every single time. I'm a romantic to the core and a kiss means this to me to this day.

Rubber Duckie - Ernie ... Can a play list be without Sesame Street? Sure, but I don't prefer it.

London Bridge & Fergalicious - Fergie ... I might have bad taste in music, I'm ok with that - but I work out faster and longer with these songs and I could be in line at the grocery store - if these songs comes on the radio I will dance. Period.

Wind it Up - Gwen Stefani ... Do you know she yodels in this song? I usually want to be creative after I hear her music and I also want stroll down my street listening to this on my iPod and totally rock out my neighborhood. I'm also a die hard fan of Gwen Stefani. When we have dance parties after nap time here, this song is always on the play list. Jessica also loves Gwen. Maybe more than me actually. She definitely has music in her veins.

Banana Pancakes - Jack Johnson ... There's a line in this song in which he sings Hawaiian. A foreign language of any kind makes me weak in the knees. When I was 16, my parents and I went on a month long vacation in a motor home - we were in a Dunkin Donuts when a biker came in and was standing in line behind us - I made some 16 year old comment about how cool his bike was and he SPOKE FRENCH TO ME. Poli vu France? (I'm spelling that phonetically) Do you speak French? He said more, but my mind went blank after that - I would have ridden away into the sunset with him after that, no matter he was in his mid forties. He was the sexiest man alive to me.

Life Uncommon - Jewel ... Pretty much Jewel was what got me through a lot of teenage angst and has continued to speak to me in some way. Some people don't like her voice, I love it. I'll always follow her career - I think she's awesome. This song is about not giving up. And the power of voices is the sound of freedom.

Soul Food - Leela James ... I like the funkiness of this song. And the flirtation. I belt this at the top of my lungs in my car. Jessica even knows the words. I also secretly aspire to be a singer someday, I would consider her an influence. Being tone-deaf and not having control over my breathing when singing is a big obstacle though, apparently.

I had no idea how quiet I was until I was a stay at home mom. Some times my days would be one long silent moment. However active my mind was didn't matter - I just didn't ever think to have the radio or some music playing. But music is a very intricate part of me. Not because I play an instrument or sing well but I love moving to music, whether thats dancing or playing with Jessica or simply driving in my car. When music is playing I literally feel it in the pit of my stomach, like a clock swaying my every cell to the beat. It's a passion of mine, however dusty it may be.

- We woke up this morning in wonderful spirits and cuddled with Jessica on the couch before getting ready.

- Jessica and I headed to GR to see my dad and despite road conditions we had a seamless journey.

- We got breakfast for free.

- Had homemade whole wheat toast, heavenly.

- Jessica slept the whole way home.

- The weather is forcing me to get to know my camera more, which I'm loving.

- Downloaded iTunes free download of the week. Appropriately titled The Rain. Bonus.

The food was amazing, the hotel far exceeded any expectation, the speakers and topics were interesting, helpful and sought after and the location was central and interesting. What makes a great event?

Food is an obvious deal breaker - there needs to be great food, amazing food. And there needs to be a lot of it. Snacks and candy and bright colors. Presentation is key. Focus on the attendees - are they energetic? Bring in foods and props that evoke energy - Red Bull, purified water, Twizlers. Is the crowd or all around event more low key? Bring in calm colors, foods, hot drinks and purified waters.

The event itself has to be something your audience wants. Are you looking to have a girls weekend away? Then don't advertise speakers or events on how to get stains out of your carpet. You need to take the audience out of their environment and put them in your own. Your environment needs to be bleeding with the message you want them to walk away with.

For example at Gospelcon's 2005 conference there was no doubt that we were getting together to have a great weekend learning from the anticipated speakers and topics but to also have purpose on the internet and bring integrity to the web. Their signage screamed this without having to say a thing.

It was designed well, professional and there was pride in the "product" Gospelcon was marketing to us. What makes a great event to you, or have you been to one that blew you out of the water? What about it was so awesome?

I blow my nose. In the shower. So self deprecating. Although I've made good use of the paper towels in our kitchen as of late I think we'd have less visits from the plumber to de-clog the drain if I could keep it in my nose for 10 more minutes.

Are you cringing yet? Because I am.

Aaron owns more nail-clippers than are sold in bulk at Sams Club. Every gas station we stop at on a road trip, EVERY gas station, he buys one. Why? Probably because the one he bought last time - it's under his seat, and thats just too much work to bend over and retrieve. No, 99 cents in cheap enough to invest in a Brand New Nail Clipper!

He's very good at keeping his pretty hands pretty. Me on the other hand, I think I've used a nail clipper a total of 10 times since we've been married ok since we've been dating. Ah what the hell, since I learned what one was used for. I'm a peeler. You know how Uncle Sal bites his nails at Thanksgiving before going to the kitchen to carve the turkey? And we all know he doesn't wash his hands first. Well I generally pick at my toe-nails while watching TV and then I'll shake your hand. It's so nice to meet you.

If I eat dairy of any form or pop or anything carbonated; if I consume sugar in mass quantities - I burp. A lot. And in public.

Some things I'd like to adopt as good habits would be the ability to wake up before my daughter and have a grip on what my day is going to be like so when she wakes up I'm not a zombie waiting for nap time to come around.

I'd also enjoy the habit of being disciplined enough to do my hair every day. I spend money on the hair cuts and I give it about 2 weeks before I stop preparing myself for human contact. Although this hair cut is much easier to do. The curling iron - I bought you but you own me. You're so damn intimidating.

Answering my phone would also be a good habit to form. I screen every call and unless you're Aaron you're most likely going into voice mail. I've gotten better but it goes in waves. I'm just not a phone talker. Email is so convenient and much more conducive to my hermit lifestyle.

Now it's your turn. Give me one bad and one good habit you already posses. And I'm not asking here people, start talking.